Phase 3 Day 5

Today is the 5th day of Phase 3. My stress level went down a notch as of yesterday evening. My son, who is at Air Force Basic Training, finally called. It's only been 10 days since he left, and I know that he is in a safe environment and being taken care of, but I just needed to know how he was doing. Not physically, because he is a very strong kid. But mentally. He said that he was having a great time and working hard, food was good, PT easy peasey, following the rules, no problem. The hardest part for him, folding his clothes the way THEY want him too. The biggest question for me was did he have any regrets about going in. NO REGRETS he said. They took 1,000lbs off my shoulders. Looking forward to going to San Antonio to participate in his Graduation. April 12th won't come soon enough.

My weekend is over, back to work today. I need to hit the store for some more avocados and some la Croix sparkling water. I hear everyone using vanilla cream and rootbeer stevia in this for a type of soda. yumm. I'm not a big soda drinker, but this would be a change.

Still looking for Dukes mayo. (no sugar) .

I'm going for a walk this morning, then to the store.

Menu for the day:

Breakfast: yogurt and berries
Snack: Protein shake w coconut milk, coconut oil and chocolate stevia
Lunch: Steak and Onion fajita salad, w cheddar, salsa and sour cream
Snack: apple w/ almond butter
Dinner: Asian Sesame Salmon, asparagus,
Snack: smoked gouda

Went for a 4 mile walk, found my mayo Dukes has no added sugar. I wanted to make some chicken or crab salad. Yippee!

Stall~~~~~~~~~~

Grrrr. This is the most frustrating part of this diet. Up~~Down~~Up~~Down.

Seems I've put the brakes on today. Same weight as yesterday, 221.4. I only have 3 days left of HCG injections and 6 days of VLCD. I am really wanting to get to my goal of 36 pounds lost in this, my first, round. C'mon it's only 1.4 lbs. This makes me want to starve myself for the next 5 days. But I know that I can't Grrrr

I'm not going to stress too much. I did work out kind of hard yesterday. Hopefully it is water.

I'm still trying to cope with the fact that my son is gone. Even though he can be an ungrateful thing, I miss him dearly. At least I have his address now and can flood him with mail. I am trying to write him and send cards every day.

Today I have errands and chores to do. Lots of them. One of them is to get my sons mountain bike to the shop and have it repaired into working condition. It's been sitting for a while. I have a co-worker that I want to start riding with on different trails. Man-made of course. Miami is flat as a pancake.

Then to clean my sons room. It looks like a disaster area. Clothes everywhere. I don't know what's washed or not. So, I'm just going to wash everything. This should take a few hours. Maybe burn off some extra calories.

I'm hoping that the scale tomorrow will reward all my hard work today. I am totally POP (perfectly on protocal) and I know that I have downed over a gallon of water today.

If you are reading this.....please send good ju-ju my way.

The menu for the day...

Lunch: beef and onion fajita salad with salsa

Snack: apple drizzled with english toffee stevia and cinnamon (tastes like a caramel apple, yum)

Dinner: Blackened shrimp grilled in the Foreman, roasted asparagus with lemon pepper

Day 38 and Trying to Recover

It's Day 38th of the HCG diet. I have 8 more days of the VLCD to go. Then on to maintenance. I am still trying to recover from my swerve off protocal 2 days ago. They say it takes 2 days for your body to "own"a loss or gain. So, if my cheating is going to show, it will be today. Needless to say, I am not so anxious to get on the scale.

I slept okay last night (with the help of sleeping pills). I am still emotional about my sons leaving. He finally go to the AF Base late yesterday evening. I'm sure hes more exhausted than I. It is going to be a big physical and emotional adjustment for both of us.

Now I sit on pins and needles waiting for the phone call with his address. I cant wait to start writing him.

On to diet related stuff. I have a funeral at 11am then work at 2. Trying to figure out when to fit my lunch in. If I have to, I will take a lunch box. Definitely eat a fruit before I go. Made that mistake once and ended up eating PB crackers so I didn't pass out.

The menu for the day. In no particular order.

Orange roughy, spinach
Shrimp, brussel sprouts
Veal Steak

i know. That's a horrible menu.

Tomorrow will be a better day. I finally got the call from my son. Feeling less stressful right now.

Getting Back on Track

My son is gone....I spent all day yesterday at the Military Processing Center. He finally left around 3pm. Missing him already. I had another difficult night sleeping. I'm sure this will get easier. Ihave a funeral to go to this morning and then work.

Yesterday, I didn't think to take a fruit of something with me to MEPS. By 1pm, I was feeling truely lightheaded and dizzy. I kept drinking my water, but it wasn't helping. I had to break down and get some PB crackers from the vending machine. I knew it was wrong, but it was the best option in the machine. I ate them and felt better physically, but guilty emotionally. On the way home, after a very sad goodbye, I caved. I stopped by KFC and got one of their bowls, mashed potatoes, chicken nuggets, corn, gravey, cheese. Boy did I screw up. Who knows what the scale will show today. I'm very upset with myself and I know that I am going to have gained and it will show today or tomorrow.

Today I will be back on track and tomorrow I will start my walks again. Guilt is a horrible thing. Stress is a horrible thing. but I must move forward and just let it go. Learn from the mistake, try not to let it happen again and carry on.

Well here goes nothing. Time to get on the scale and see the damage. 223.6 damn.

Oh well...keep calm and carry on

Todays Menu

workout

Snack: egg whites

Lunch: roast beef and cabbage

Snack: 1/2 grapefruit

Dinner: onion crusted veal, asparagus

Snack: ????

Ball of Nerves

It's early and I slept like crap. last night, after dinner, we came home and got my sons things ready to go. By 9:45 we were out the door and on the way to the hotel where he stayed last night. That was hard enough. This morning, he will wake and then go to the Military Entrance Processing Command (MEPS)for his final paperwork and swearing in. Then the group will leave on a shuttle to the airport and off to Lackland Air Force Base for basic training. I was tearing up last night when I dropped him at the hotel, he said "Mom, this is just goodnight, I will see you in the morning." It still stung like a thousand needles.
Needless to say, I didn't sleep well last night and will be leaving soon for MEPS to hang out with him for a little bit, say goodbye and watch him fly off into the wild blue yonder. As much trouble as he can be sometimes., I'm gonna miss him horribly.

Why bring this up? Well, they say stress and lack of sleep can be a big factor in weightloss. there have been a lot of studies that have linked weight loss/gain to stress, depression and sleep deprivation. I am hoping that this doesn't have an adverse affect on the diet. Today I am up 3 lbs. Is it stress, lack of sleep, sadness, or just the Red Lobster I ate last night? Who knows, but the combination of any of those could have done it.

I'm not going to get upset about it. It is what it is. Why add more stress fuel to the fire.

The rest of this morning will probably be one of the most difficult life moments for me. My son will be leaving, I will have an empty nest. I got some comfort last night from a friend who recently sent her son away to Virginia for college. She told me that I would cry, I would walk around in circles not knowing what to do. I would sit in his room and cry. The difference between her and I? She can contact her son everyday. I can't. I'm going to keep a little note pad with questions so that they are ready when he gets the chance to call.

Sigh....it's going to be a  long day.

Menu for the day....totally messed up
Lunch: pack of pb crackers from the vending machine
Dinner: KFC Bowl, coleslaw and a biscuit

Boy do I feel guilty. I would try to justify that it was stress and sadness that made me do it. But that's why I am fat to begin with. I need to quit trying to blame it on the food. The bottom line is that it was my choice to eat those things. I definitely need to work on the emotional aspect of the eating plan.

Still Going Down

Well, it's Saturday, February 4th 2011. I'm up at 50 for some unknow reason, same as yesterday. I've logged my sleep pattern for my doctor. I'm just going to have to take something tonight.

I did, however, wake up to a .5lb loss, yay! As long as the scale keeps heading in the downward direction, I am happy. This brings my total loss to 27 1/2 pounds in 26 days. I'm certainly not complaining.

Lot's of running to do today. My sons car is still not fixed. So I have to take him to work. Then scramble to find $1500 to pay for the bill. Stress. I can't believe he leaves in 10 days (more stress). But we'll get over this hump. I really need to start planning for the trip to see him graduate in April.  From the diets perspective, I should be in Phase 4 by then. When I return, I will probably do another round. I already have money put aside for it.

I have some things to do around the house today. I might get some jewelry work done.

I've been having some trouble with modifying the times of my supplements.  I spoke to a nutritionist and they told me that the best time to take my multivitamin and minerals is before I go to bed. The reason: When you go to sleep, your body will absorb and distribute your vitamins all through the night, and they will have a chance to stay in the body. If you take them in the morning, or during the day, you will most likely expell most of the vitamins. Especially on this diet, due to the fact that you are drinking so much water and flushing out the fat. So my new regiment will be vitamins at night. I just hope that the vitamins don't keep me from sleeping any less than I am right now.

Menu for the day:

Snack: protein juice
Snack: Orange
Went for a short walk with the dog and then did 20 minutes on the elliptical machine (we'll see what the loss is in the am)
Lunch: roast beef, warm apple, cabbage onion slaw (1/2 apple)
Dinner: chicken, spinach, chard soup
Snack: 1/2 apple baked with cinnamon

UP 4 POUNDS -what the heck?

I have my midway check up with the doctor. I will be weighed and re-measured. (Need to make sure I get copies of the firstones and this one, also my labs) I will probably have more labs done. Need to have the 2nd half meds mixed for me.

Hopefully, the Doctor will be happy with my progress, I know that I am.
Well, I just stepped on the scale and was horrified. I gained 4 lbs..yes 4 lbs. I stepped on the scale 2-3 times to make sure I wasn't seeing things.

How the hell does that happen. Lot's of water, lots of peeing, perfectly on protocol, That's alot of weight to gain. This is the kind of crap that makes me want to quit. I'm suffering, there, I said it suffering through this diet and what, to gain 4 pounds. Crap, I didn't even gain that much on load day eating crap.
I need to cool off.

Wll, I just got back from the doctors. She encouraged me and said I was doing great, and that it is probably water waiting to woosh away. I showed her all my food journals, my weight graphs and nutrition pie charts.
She told me that the scale has a good and evil side and that weighing daily could be joyful or painful. One of the FB Page members said that she was going to put her scale in the closet for a week, stay on protocol and see what happens at the end of the week. I just may do that too.

The doctor upped my dosage from 150 to 175. And she also said that my thyroid function is very very sluggish. 3 points above where it should be. She started me on Synthroid. I will start taking that tomorrow. Back for a checkup 10 days from now.
It's funny, every time I have had thyroid tests done, they have come back fine. Surprising, because when I was 12, I was diagnosed with an adolescent goiter and hypothyroidism. I was taking synthroid then. My endocrinologist died and my mother never took me back. Then all my tests appeared within the normal range. So nothing more was done about it.

We'll see what affect the meds have.
I told her about the egg whites in the am and showed her the correlation to the weight loss. She asked what the "protein juice" was, I told her and expressed my fear that I was losing too much muscle mass.
She seemed okay with it even though it isn't on protocol.
She also wanted me to keep track of my sleeping as it relates to weight loss/gain. She said that not getting good REM sleep contributes to fat retention. So I will add that to my daily journal.


All I can do is KEEP CALM AND CARRY ON.......

I did have a bit of an issue with the way that the assistant measured me. According to her, I have only lost 1 inch in each, waist, hips and chest. I cant see how thats accurate since I have gone down in clothing size and have no ass to put in my jeans.  She measured me fully clothed with baggy jeans and shirt. I am going to measure myself tomorrow when I get up. Keep track of it  myself.

I'm going to work out for a bit. Maybe sweat out some of this water. Then I will make my lunch and then off to work.

Menu for the day:
Lunch:chicken, spinach
Snack: Orange
Dinner: Shrimp on a salad
Snack: 1 sm grapefruit (they look like oranges)

Halfway there......

Today starts the second half of my 42 day HCG Diet Round. I have endured through 21 full days of the VLCD (very low calorie diet). Have I been tempted, sure, often. But have deicded that I am worth staying true to the diet. I have made some modifications on days that I know I will have strenuous activity. If I get really hungry, I have made better choices on what to "cheat" on.

My goal for this round was 36lbs, although, from the information I have read, it's 42 days or 34 lbs, whichever comes first. Not sure why the 34lb limit.

My son and I are at odds. The air is so thick in the house you can cut it with a knife. It shouldn't be this way. He leaves in 15 days for the Air Force. But, it seems he doesn't have any need or desire to spend quality time with me before he leaves. What does that say about me? I feel very stressed and I don't like it. Even if he doesn't feel the need, why wouldn't he do it for me, knowing that "I" need it? All I know, is that I don't need the stress in the house. Enough about that....on to me.

I can honestly say that I am so happy that I decided to start this journey. I am pleased with the results so far. It's just a shame that this process costs so much money. Not everyone had $600 buck to throw down every 3 months. When I am done with this round, I will do the 3 week stabilization and then on to maintenance.
I really need to find out if it is okay to continue to lose while on Phase 4 (maintence) or will I gain back what I lose then. I really want to get back to working out hard.
I will probably do another round. I have already earmarked part of my income tax return for a potential 2nd round. We'll have to see how I do on phase 4. That is still 6 weeks away. No need to worry about that right now. (I'm a planner, what can I say)

Let's get back to the present. Not sure what my plans are for the morning. I need to get some work done out in the shed. But also work later. Don't want to wear myself out.

Menu for the day:

Snack: 1/2 grapefruit, protein juice
Lunch: crab salad and asparagus
Snack: apple
Dinner: Roast beef fajita lettuce wraps, brussel sprouts

My Son is Leaving- Stress and Dieting

I have done the research and know that stress definitely plays a role in weight gain. When you are stressed, Cortisol levels rise and cause your metabolism to slow. I am getting ready to go through some stress and need to nip it in the bud and sontrol the stress level.

My son told me last night that his Air Force recruiter has given him an opportunity to leave earlier than expected. Because of his job choice in the Air Force, if he doesn't go now, they don't know when he will leave. He wants to get this next chapter of his life moving. I am proud of him for that. But he will leave on February 14th. That's a little over 3 weeks away. aaack. That's too soon. I know that not wanting him to leave so soon is selfish on my part, and I know that I need to, literally, let him spread his wings and take flight. But I'm a mom and he is still my baby boy. So, on top of him leaving, it will also create an empty nest for me. And being a single mom, an empty house. Leaving me alone. So I need to try to get through this and not let it affect me negatively. I must keep positive thoughts about the entire situation. I am very excited for him. But not so much for me................